


Paper Planes

by AredandNoirbutterfly, luminfics



Series: Round 2018 [18]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-03
Updated: 2018-07-03
Packaged: 2019-06-04 18:21:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15152945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AredandNoirbutterfly/pseuds/AredandNoirbutterfly, https://archiveofourown.org/users/luminfics/pseuds/luminfics
Summary: Minseok and Luhan have been penpals for years but Minseok’s rebellious nature has always made him too afraid to show his true colors to the other.





	Paper Planes

**Author's Note:**

> Username: anonymous until reveals  
> Prompt Number: #56  
> Title: Paper Planes  
> Rating: PG-13  
> Warnings: Swearing, angst, cliche’s. Soccer tbh.
> 
> Author's Notes: I’m sorry this went way off in the prompt and for all the terrible attempts at angst. I am terrible at writing different perspectives. I’m also sorry about all the confusing elements. I’m just sorry in general prompter, I’m sure you wanted more fluff than this!

 

**Part I**

 

Kim Minseok was, as far as people knew, a bit of a trouble maker.

 

Just a _little_ bit.

 

He was the kid that in primary school, if the teacher told them not to take snacks from class, he’d take more snacks on purpose.

 

He was the kid who if his mother told him _“don’t hang around with that kid”_ he’d hang out with that kid anyway.

 

He was the kid who got into fights with the other kids for no reason, just for the fun of it.

 

It wasn’t that he had a…. disregard for the rules, per say.

 

It’s just that it irked him in many ways to be told what to do and his temper did not help.

 

Walking into school, he took a hold of his book bag and swung it over his shoulder casually. It was early morning and waiting for the others in his group was the only thing to do. He actually wasn’t a terrible student, which is probably why he didn’t get into major, major trouble, and his teachers somewhat tolerated him despite his attitude towards disobeying them purposely.

 

As he walked into his classroom, there were a few of his classmates already there, studying their little hearts out. He simply walked in and sat down in his desk, unafraid of the scrutiny or judgement inevitably thrown his way.

 

Of course his reputation would go around the school like wildfire. A cute, but violent and disobedient boy from a good family is what was whispered about him as he walked down the halls with his friends. He had no clue where they got the idea his family had tons money when he really was just middle class. It was rumored around it was his parents influence that allowed him to get away with hanging out with the “wrong crowd” or something after all. Honestly, to Minseok, his group of friends were more like sheep in wolves clothing instead of the other way around. If anything, he was probably the worst of the lot of them.

 

He ran his hands down his face for a second, trying to rub the sleep away and looking out the window at the colorful sky lighting up to start the day. He smiled to himself for a second before reaching into his bag.

 

Actually, Minseok had a secret.

 

He pulled out a few envelopes from his bag and carefully pulled their contents out into his desk, being careful of not allowing any prying eyes to witness something so private to him. He smiled seeing the curve of the lines that made his name in the front of each envelope, the carefully practiced Korean in every page he pulled out, the colorful pens and markers used to adorn each page. Yes, this was Minseok’s personal secret. It was his most precious treasure, and though he was in his last year of High School, this childhood constant was irreplaceable in his heart.

 

*

“But they don’t understand Korean, mom...” a seven year old Minseok had told his mom, a thick blue marker in his small chubby hand and a big piece of paper on the table. His mother flashed an amused smile, walking in his direction. She had been rinsing ingredients for dinner just before Minseok’s comment.

 

“They’re learning about Korean language too, Minseok. I’m sure he can understand you and if he can’t, someone will help him out..” she had said in order to ease his worries. Minseok’s young mind was unconvinced.

“Why do I have to write to a boy who can’t even play with me, he’s too far!” he whined, furrowing his brows. His class had homework for the week, and though simple enough, he found it odd. His parents had signed him up for an apparently “special school” (as his mother called it) when he had begun taking his formal school lessons. A few of the “perks” of the school apparently was that it included lots of foreign exposure and necessary lessons in math, history and science. With a few basic courses to begin teaching children introductory lessons for English, Chinese, Japanese and French as well, it ate a lot more time than a normal child’s primary school should have, he thought. Minseok complained often, unable to understand why he, unlike some of his other friends from the previous year, had more things to learn about in any given week.

 

“It’ll be good for you in the future, dear. Besides, he’s from China right? If you make an effort and learn to speak fluent Chinese in the future, he might come visit you.” his mother said simply, trying to entice him into learning another language with the promise of a new friend. And Minseok took her bait, hook, line and sinker, as he looked up at her from his seat, his wide, innocent eyes wondering if he could really have a new friend to play with. He smiled at his paper as he got to work, unintentionally reading what he tried to write as fast as possible.

 

“Hello, Luhan, My name is Xiumin” he said to himself as he wrote. His mother smiled, watching him from her place near the stove.

 

*

“How are things with your chinese boyfriend?” Jongdae had asked Minseok one day at lunch.

 

Minseok, now twelve, rolled his eyes and gave him an unimpressed look at the constant question.

 

“Again, he’s not my boyfriend, and things are great, thanks.” he supplied his answer with even more disinterest. They were alone, the rest of their friends elsewhere, doing god knows what. Though his best friend’s comment was not malicious, Minseok was aware that boys didn’t normally have boyfriends and that liking another boy seemed to be taboo. But regardless of it all, it never seemed wrong to Minseok. He figured it didn’t make a difference, and he didn’t realize at the time how open minded his mentality was in comparison to the majority of Korea’s population.

 

Jongdae snorted at his reply, taking an apple seemingly out of nowhere and taking a juicy bite.

 

“From the way you talk about him, you’re not convincing anyone.” Jongdae retorted.

“If you liked the same crap I do, you wouldn’t need to hear about how someone gets me much better than you,” he said with no actual bitterness towards his friend. Jongdae faked offense.

“Screw you, I’m a _great_ friend, thank you very much. It’s not my fault I don’t like watching eleven random guys kick around a friggen ball for five hours or something.” Jongdae said to him. Minseok immediately turned to him, annoyed.

“It’s called FOOTBALL, Ok, ‘Dae, Football--” he said to Jongdae who waved his hand impatiently to interrupt him.

“--Whatever.” he answered, making Minseok scoff in annoyance.

“Honestly, this is why I wish I could go somewhere else, it would be much easier to talk to someone who likes football too, with someone who actually gets it. If I could just talk to--”

“Luhan,” Jongdae chorused Minseok, “Yes, Yes I know, once again, your Chinese boyfriend.” he finished, making Minseok glare at him once more before returning to his comic. Jongdae rested his chin on his hand, watching Minseok with an amused cat-like smile.

 

“Who would’ve thought the rebellious Minseok would have such a soft spot.”

 

Minseok looked up from his comic at Jongdae.

 

“We’ve been friends for years. Plus I have a soft spot for you too Dae.” he said as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

“Maybe. But your pen-pal assignment has been over for, what, five years? It’s just hard to believe you of all people would still continue to write to them.”

 

Minseok, gripping the pages of the thin book, didn’t comment. He hummed noncommittally, his eyes a little more distant.

 

“He’s my friend,” he said unsurely, feeling judged.

 

He deliberately didn’t bring up Luhan again after that.

 

*

_“Hello, Xiumin, I’m so happy to receive your letter! My name is Lu Han. I’m 7 years old too! Do you have any brothers or sisters? What do you like to play? For me, I like football and I like playing it with my friends! Please reply soon, thank you!”_

 

Minseok amusedly read the small translation at the bottom of his first letter from Luhan when they were younger, remembering his excitement at receiving the first letter addressed to him only. The paper seemed small with Luhan’s childish writing taking up huge chunks of space. He remembers asking his mom what football was, only to be told it’s another word for soccer. “Why can’t he just say soccer?” he had asked her in a genuinely confused voice, making her laugh. Now reading through the rest of his letters over the years, he was able to piece some of Lu Han’s story together somewhat.

 

 _“I went two summers to an international school in Korea based on English curriculum. In Europe they don’t say soccer, they say Football!”_ Luhan had told him once in fluent Korean a few years later. He had asked him why he said football instead of soccer a few letters back, and that had been his answer for him.

 

Their letters were frequent and Luhan’s in particular were always interesting. Luhan seemed to be all over the place and everywhere at the same time. Sometimes, he’d supply Minseok with a few pictures of himself at a few places around the world. He was still unsure what his family did or how they managed to have him go to so many different cities. In another letter months later, Luhan let him know his father was a pretty successful representative of Global Media Promotions in a popular Chinese Multimedia company. He traveled to various places around the world to promote for the company as the head of his department, and thus Luhan and his mother never stayed in one place for too long as well, following him around.

 

Seeing a particular picture of Luhan in Beijing with a small group of people, he smiled. It was hard not to be lured into his enthusiasm when Luhan’s smile and contagious energy seemed to flow out of the paper with just words, and even more so in pictures.

 

Minseok more often than not stared at the pictures containing Luhan’s face. He was very pretty, after all, with his large eyes, small face, long neck, pretty lips. His hair color changed with age, from his natural black to lighter shades of brown, bleach blonde and even having red hair at some point. He was a lot of things Minseok wasn’t.

 

Before he knew it, one cool winter night as he stared at a picture of Luhan with light brown hair, who wore a smile on his face and was captured flashing a peace sign, he realized maybe, just maybe, Minseok might be a little infatuated with his old friend.

 

*

_"I’d love to come visit someday too. It sucks because we’re so far away from each other and though I’ve been to Korea quite a lot, it’s always too busy with my dad working to ask you to come see me. I do hate it sometimes, all this traveling, because I hate flying around, but dad promised me a surprise later in the future.”_

 

Minseok, at age sixteen, raised one brow in confusion reading Luhan’s letter. Just like other times, he had carried his letters secretly to school with him, reading them to calm himself as he sat outside waiting to talk to his homeroom teacher and the school principal, foreseeing the possible doom waiting for him at home.

 

*

 _"Ah, that’s not a good thing to do, Minseok! I mean it wasn’t too terrible but you should be careful, you don’t want to get in more trouble right?”_ Luhan scolded lightly. Minseok only rolled his eyes at that, despite being a few weeks after the incident. It actually amused him a bit. Minseok knew he had to control his temper, but it was inevitable trying to go against his own nature. He hadn’t even been doing anything too bad and what happened wasn’t actually the worst trouble he’s gotten into. If only Luhan knew. After it had happened, Minseok had gotten in trouble with his parents too, his phone having been taken away as well as being forbidden to see any of his friends, but none of it mattered once he had Luhan’s letters to go through.

 

Yes, the only thing that could tame Minseok’s wild heart were the letters from a pretty Chinese boy.

 

He self consciously didn’t share any of his shenanigans with Luhan anymore after that.

 

*

 

Minseok, now seventeen, blinked at his parents.

  
“I’m sorry, what exactly am I doing?” he asked with confusion.

 

“An old friend of mine from college is moving to Seoul. His son is around your age I think and since he won’t know anyone, I told him you would show him around school.” his father had said, putting his book down and looking at Minseok with authority, the kind that said ‘defy me if you dare.’

 

“I-I mean I don’t mind, yeah, but does he even speak Korean?” he asked, eyeing his mother who was busy reading a fashion magazine of her own, glancing at him once sympathetically.

“He’s been studying Korean for a while now, so he should be fluent enough.” his father responded promptly, eyeing the page on his book a bit before turning up and looking straight at Minseok.

“It shouldn’t be much of an issue for you. You’ve had at least basic to intermediate education in Mandarin since you were younger, or are you not taking your studying as seriously as I thought, Minseok?” his father said to him in an accusing tone, making Minseok stiffen.  

 

This was also one huge reason why Minseok hated rules and confinement.

 

His parents, particularly his father, were extremely strict and always placed ridiculously high expectations on him and his sister. His mother was more subtle. As the oldest of the two, Minseok had the responsibility to make his family proud, being the obedient, successful son they have been training him to be since he was old enough to understand words. His father was, of course, less than happy to know how much trouble Minseok would get into, exasperated sighs and harsh arguments between them making their relationship harder day by day. It was tiring, and if he was being honest, being in a constant war with his father was so exhausting, sometimes he’d just give in to have some space to breathe. He figured it was the same for his father. To have Minseok behave at least normally instead of getting into fights after classes, as he had been more prone to do in the past, must give him less headaches at least.

 

“I’m always taking my classes seriously, father. My grades should show you that.” he responded back as coldly but respectfully as possible. His father closed his book and stood up, his cup of coffee on the other hand.

“Good. They will arrive in two weeks and his son will start attending your school the week after.” he said walking away, only to turn around, as if he forgot to mention something.

“And Minseok,” he started.

“..Yes?” he responded, a feeling telling him what his father’s next words will be.

“Behave yourself.”

 

Minseok sigh, annoyed, his blood boiling slightly.

“I’ll try.” he walked away without waiting to see his father’s disapproval.

 

*

_"Well the worst part about that is that we actually got into a lot of trouble because apparently you’re not supposed to get into certain places of the castle, but I was curious ok, it had to be done.”_

 

Minseok giggled (it was kind of manly ok) at Luhan’s words. The latter had traveled to Europe, showing off his visits to castles and manors and multiple football club games, from Barcelona, to Manchester United. He had been in South America for a few weeks prior, then the US for a longer time, and in one picture he was in Dubai. Even more fascinating stories and pictures always came with Luhan’s letters, the details of his travels making him green with envy. Luhan himself was prone to trouble, but his kind of trouble always seemed more like vivacious curiosity, innocent even, unlike Minseok’s own knack for compulsive reckless misbehaving. But the fact he had included recent pictures in Asia again made Minseok’s skin crawl a little. It was the closest they had been to each other for a long time.

 

He felt a little bad because though Luhan wasn’t shy at all in sharing big chunks of his life with him, Minseok wasn’t as keen to share his own, feeling his life boring in comparison. Luhan’s endless supply of pictures were not reciprocated by Minseok either. But he shared words, brutal advice and experiences, things he’d never tell another person trying to compensate for his lack of substance. He was happy Luhan didn’t cross boundaries or demand more than he was given, but there had been a few occasions when he’d express his own wishes to see a glimpse into Minseok’s world.

 

 _“Will you ever let me see your face?”_ Luhan had asked in one of his letters.

 

 _“Someday, maybe.”_ he had replied back weeks later.

 

He wasn’t really insecure about his appearance, normally he could care less about what people thought of him. But he would be lying if he said he wasn’t slightly self-conscious about what the other boy would think of him and his now light brown hair, weirdly big eyes and skinny legs.

 

It seemed with age, the revelation he once had at thirteen had not changed at all. Minseok’s small crush on Luhan only seemed to have grown with the years. _It was just adolescent passion_ , he reasoned with himself at first. But the more he thought about it, the more he came to accept his own feelings for what they were. And despite feeling like he was trapped in the world with a future that screamed order, with Luhan in his heart, he felt free.

 

Sitting in his desk, returning back to reality, again taking a look at the even brighter sky than when he had arrived, Minseok re-read Luhan’s letter, one received last week.

 

_“I’ve got a surprise for you!”_

 

Puzzled, he heard approaching footsteps and promptly put his things away, smiling at Jongdae and Yixing as they approached him.

 

“Let’s get out of here,” he said to them, grabbing his things and heading towards the door.

 

*

“But Dad, I told you I have plans today!” he said, trying to hold back any real sort of whining that could get him in trouble.

 

His father looked up from his breakfast, fully suited to head to work and flashed Minseok and authoritative glare.

 

“We discussed this a while back and you had agreed. If you don’t keep your promise, you will make me look bad. Is that what you want? You want an important person to, not just me, but my job, see what an irresponsible person your father and his family are?” he ruthlessly guilt tripped.

 

Minseok bit his lip, trying not ask his father why he cared so much for what others thought. He honestly had forgotten he had promised to show a foreign kid around. In reality, it wasn’t that hard to just go for it, he didn’t have any real plans anyway. Jongdae and Baekhyun just wanted to skip homeroom and a bit of the more boring classes to go to Gangnam. He could do it, but he couldn’t do it without being annoyed. It was so difficult for his brain.

 

“You know I don’t, father. It slipped my mind but if I could jus--”

“Enough.” his father said. The doorbell rang loudly at that very moment.

“But--”

“You promised me, Minseok. Now go. He’s here.” his father said, as he stood up to get the door. Minseok sighed in annoyance and followed with his arms crossed. Ok, so he had no option. Maybe if he did this without being a pain, his father wouldn’t be so mad if he found out about the skipping classes every morning for two weeks. He smiled a bit to himself. Yes, this might not be too bad.

 

As he reached the door, he saw his father with a rare, wide smile. Minseok rarely saw his father smile even at his mother, so whoever the man was, he was probably very important to his father.  

 

“Minkyung.” the man said, patting his father’s back like an old, distant friend. His father returned the gesture.

“It’s been a long time, Lu Jie. This is my son, Minseok” he greeted, signaling to Minseok as cued. Minseok bowed politely, the man greeting him properly as well not knowing what else to do. After that, he tried not to roll his eyes, a few minutes passing of the two men talking in the same calm but excited tone, all things he didn’t know about of course. He grew bored almost immediately before the man looked at his watch.

 

“I unfortunately have to go, but let’s catch up over dinner sometime this week, shall we? Since we’re headed the same way, I would be more than happy to offer you guys a ride with us.” the man, Lu Jie, asked nicely. Normally Minseok commuted to school and he smiled at the man, ready to accept the ride.

“That’s very kind of you, but unfortunately, I have to take my own car today. I have important business that requires it. Minseok here, will be happy to show your son the public commute to school he’ll have to take on a regular basis.“ he declined politely, making Minseok fume silently beside him. Lu Jie smiled graciously.

“I completely understand.” he said before turning to Minseok, who only blinked back at the sudden attention.

“So I guess my son is in your care for today then?” he smiled. There was something kind about the man, and he decided he seemed nice. Minseok smiled back politely, feeling his father’s intense gaze telling him to behave.

“Yes, sir. Whenever he’s ready.” he replied not unkindly. Lu Jie smiled at him, giving a slight pat on Minseok’s shoulder leading him out. He followed dumbly, his father still waiting by the door.

“We’re very sorry for the inconvenience, but I’m sure you guys will get along just fine.” Lu Jie said to him, a sparkle in his eye.

 

Minseok didn’t know what to say, the awkwardness he felt so strong, it probably showed on his face. He walked up to the car parked right on front, a sleek black export, the windows down and door slightly open. Inside he saw a person with blonde-ish hair who wore the same uniform he was obligated to wear at the moment. The dread in his chest intensified.

 

“Han, can you come out here please?” Lu Jie called out. .

 

The person sitting inside turned fully and there was something extremely familiar about them, Minseok couldn’t quite put his finger on.

 

Everything after seemed to happen in cliche slow motion, when with a fluid motion, the person, the boy, fully came out of the car, a smile on his face and an excited glint in his eyes. Minseok, who at that moment had stopped walking altogether, felt his lungs burn, his stomach dropped, his everything was set on fire as he gazed upon a face he never thought he’d see in the flesh. His eyes widened and he didn’t even know what was happening with his mouth, if it was open, closed, anything. A pair of familiar doe eyes looked at him, the boys gaze turning puzzled as he glanced at Minseok and then back at his father.

 

“H-Hello?” the boy’s melodious voice nervously spoke, flashing a self conscious smile and a small polite wave.

“Han this is Kim Minseok, my friend Kim Minkyung’s son.” Lu Jie said to the boy before turning to Minseok.

 

“Minseok, this is my son, Lu Han.”

 

And just like that Minseok couldn’t breathe.

 

*

“Dae. Dae. Dae….Dae….. Fuckin Jongdae please pick up….. Come on, don’t do this to me I need you……. _please_...” he talked to his phone.

 

He was crouching in the floor near his window, his phone in hand. He had dialed Jongdae’s number, texted him, threatened him, everything to get a reply just for it to be of no avail.

 

After his father’s friend had introduced his son to him, he had promptly left, seemingly late to a meeting. Minseok’s own father had invited Luhan inside to wait for Minseok to give his signal to head to school together, while his mother offered him some breakfast. Minseok took the opening chance and ran upstairs to his room as fast as humanly possible, his heart beating a thousand miles a minute. He tried to seem calm at his mother’s questions; she had asked why his face was so red, if he felt ok. Minseok reassured her he was fine with a convincing facade as she smiled at her son.

 

The thing is…. Minseok was having a complete break down.

 

He could not understand what was happening but the reality was that this boy, this absolutely beautiful boy, with golden hair like the sun, his large eyes, pretty face, long neck, everything familiar from years of photographs and the occasional video seemed to be exactly who Minseok thought he was. There was no possibility of this being a mistake right? There couldn’t be two people in the world who looked exactly the same, talked exactly the same etc, right?

 

This person was the person he’s been dreaming of meeting for years. His best friend through the mail, the only person who understands Minseok’s love for football and coffee and martial arts and funny movies and everything in between, his happy pill, his secret love.

 

This boy is Lu Han.

 

“Minseok what’s going on up there? You’ll make both of you late if you don’t hurry.” he heard his mother’s muffled voice. He glanced at his door, feeling like he was trapped, the tightness in his chest signaling a severe anxiety. He stood up and gathered his things, his phone clutched in his hand desperately, wishing for Jongdae to reply back to keep him sane.

 

“Coming!” he said and headed down stairs to his doom, catching Luhan glance his way the second he came into view.

 

He shuddered.

 

*

“This is the gate, it should already be open by 7am if you come early.” Minseok said to Luhan as he tried desperately not to stutter. Luhan smiled and nodded at him, unaware of what effect that had on Minseok.

 

It was uneventful from his house to the school grounds, including their interactions. To the world, it looked like two quiet friends on their way to school. The only thing seemingly out of place being Minseok’s reluctance to look at Luhan in the eyes for longer than necessary as they rode the bus together, side by side. Minseok figured he’d feign the proper, normal kind of awkward since they didn’t know eachother, but Minseok more often than not could swear he felt Luhan’s eyes linger on his face and he desperately tried not to blush. It was mortifying to say the very least. As they reached the entrance to the school building, Luhan took out a piece of paper. Minseok figured it was his schedule and possibly further instructions. Seeing it also confirmed Luhan was in his class as well, his internal sobbing echoing in his ears.

“Thank you for showing me the way here. I know it’s a bit awkward for you, me being new here and all, but I really hope we can be good friends.” Luhan said to him with a thankful voice laced with hope.

 

Minseok swallowed, wanting to cry. _‘If you’re who I think you are, we’re already good friends, idiot..’_ he thought to himself, willing his muscles to form a smile. He spotted Jongdae and Yixing walking in their direction, curiosity on their faces seeing an unfamiliar person. He had never been happier to see them.

 

“No problem. Um….I’ll see you around.” he said to Luhan with a small smile before turning away towards the doors leading to the outside of the school where his friends had come from. Luhan looked at him in confusion.

 

“Wait, aren’t you going to class?” he asked, making Minseok freeze. He sighed quietly.

 

“T-they won’t ask, since you’re knew and all, but if they do, you haven’t seen me ok?” Minseok said before walking away, not daring to look back at Luhan’s no doubtedly disappointed face.

 

*

A couple of weeks after Luhan’s arrival, it didn’t take long for the school to be swept up in China fever. It reminded Minseok a bit of when Yixing had transferred, except it was much, much worse.

 

Luhan’s easy going personality and interesting background charmed not only his class, but rumors going around about a Chinese Prince in the school had gathered quite a bit of attention from his whole grade. Minseok noticed during class that Luhan was intelligent and actively participant, delighting the staff, and becoming the source of envy from the more academically competitive students. His presence even motivated a flock to tackle the Chinese Language extracurricular class for mandatory Foreign Language credit.

 

It sort of sickened him, this whole thing being the sort of cliche dramas or manhwas had. The only thing needed was a fanclub for Luhan to complete the whole cliche, and just the thought of it made him seethe in annoyance.

 

Despite his seemingly likable nature and popular disposition, however, Luhan still commuted every morning to school with Minseok. He always tried to engage Minseok in conversation, but seemed to give up mid-way at Minseok’s lack of interest, unbeknownst to Luhan of Minseok’s desperate struggle to not show his true feelings. He even tried to convince himself that maybe, just maybe, this Luhan wasn’t _his_ Luhan. But Minseok had actually spotted Luhan with one of his older letters. Minseok wondered countless of times why Luhan didn’t put two and two together, how he couldn’t tell the letters were from him. And then he remembered, not only did he use an alias, both of them had used P.O Boxes, something quite rare and normally should be inaccessible to normal citizens. Minseok used his old school district’s sasoham box to continue writing to Luhan, using the excuse at one point of how the school’s spirit had fueled his strong academic launched friendship in order to get away with it. He even volunteered to pick up the mail and deliver it to the school district staff in exchange. Luhan himself actually had more than one even, many different addresses shared over the years for their exchange of letters, so their actual home addresses were never shared either. He sighed.

 

“Sorry, I hope I’m not boring you...” Luhan would say to Minseok more often than not. And Minseok would shrug noncommittally and turn away.

“It’s cool, you’re not.” he’d reply coldly. After he was sure Luhan wasn’t paying attention anymore, he’d bite his lip in sadness.

 

 _‘I could never be bored of you.’_ he’d think to himself.

 

*

“So he really did come. Wow. Can’t say I was expecting that.” Jongdae commented one morning a few weeks later. The two of them had just arrived and Jongdae was sitting casually in his seat, his books out in the open, obviously trying to finish the homework he missed the day before. Luhan had gone to his own seat closer to the front, so Minseok took his place next to Jongdae on the last row next to the window.

 

“What do you mean?” he asked,a casual tone masking his fear.

“Don’t play dumb with me. I didn’t want to say anything because you haven’t mentioned him in years, but….I remember. This Luhan is _the_ Luhan right? The one from your letters? I mean, unless his name is that common, but I’d never believe that. What are the odds of that right? It has to be him.” he spoke in a hushed tone, compassionately guarding Minseok’s secret. Breaking out in a cold sweat at having this reality be out in the open, Minseok still tried his damnest to keep it to himself. He couldn’t admit it. He couldn’t be that pathetic.

“W-What gives you that idea???” he questioned, hating himself for having his voice crack at the most inopportune times. Jongdae scoffed loudly.

“Cut the crap, Seok. Do you honestly think I’m that dumb??? I see the way you look at him when you think no one’s looking. Maybe he’s dumber than he looks to not notice, but I _know_ you. I knew you were acting weird for a reason. You even sit in class more often now. Nothing in the world could make you stay before.” he told Minseok accusingly.

 

The teacher chose that moment to walk in and start homeroom. Minseok chanced a glance at Luhan who sat almost all the way across the room from his own seat, his face cast downwards as he arranged papers and books on his desk.

 

Minseok sighed deeply, before in a harsh whisper, Jongdae let him know just how well he knew his best friend.

 

“I know you’ve kept in touch with him this whole time.”

 

*

The boys in Minseok’s class decided to play football for lunch. They went down to the field and though he would normally go with his friends, he tagged along anyway and pretend it was for the love of the game. Well more like Minseok pretended to pay attention to the game while just taking it easy, while Jongdae grilled him about his situation with Luhan, the latter playing football excitedly with the rest of the boys in the class. There was a lot of cheering for a friendly game, courtesy of the girls from his year and younger. Minseok’s slight frown was not hidden from Jongdae’s sharp eyes.

 

“Why have you not told him?” he asked, straight to the point.

Minseok, sitting on the bench, lifted his legs until he comfortably hugged his knees, still watching the game ahead.

“Tell him what?” he asked back, still feigning no knowledge of what his friend was going about.

“Oh, I don’t know, that you’re his long term pen-pal and love of his life?” he said.

 

Minseok tried not to visibly flinch at the mention of his crush on Luhan. Jongdae wasn’t aware of how accurate his words were when it came to that aspect of his and Luhan’s relationship, but he couldn’t, he would not allow anyone to know, not even his best friend. He turned and glared at his friend, his arms crossed over his knees.

“I told you, it’s not like that! Cut it out!” he hissed.

“What--? Of course it--Oh…. look sharp, young one, he’s coming this way.” Jongdae smiled.

“Stop kidding aroun--”

 

Minseok jumped slightly listening to hurried footsteps running towards them. He turned just in time to catch Luhan sprinting their way, his hair wet with sweat and shirt slightly clinging to his upper body. Minseok wanted to puke, his anxiety increasing ten fold because he was afraid he was drooling. Luhan was so ridiculously attractive, with his long and toned legs, it made his stomach twist uncomfortably and the thought of having his feelings show through terrified him.

 

“Minseok! Did you catch that goal I made?” he asked brightly. Minseok sported his face to be as disinterested as possible. Jongdae’s gaze burned him, the judgement evident.

“I didn’t, sorry.” he lied, smiling detachedly.

 

Of course he had seen Luhan score. He even saw his idiotic but cute celebratory dance. But he definitely could not have the other know of that. Luhan’s face seemed to fall slightly for a second, before smiling again.

“Why don’t you come play with us? I’ve heard you’re a good player.” he asked nicely.

“I’m alright, really. Maybe some other time.” he replied politely but disinterestedly. Luhan looked disappointed but eventually smiled.

“Ok. Next time then.” he said before sprinting away.

 

“He likes you.” Jongdae said once Luhan was out of their hearing range. Minseok rolled his eyes.

“He likes everyone.” he replied back defeatedly.

 

He wasn’t wrong. Luhan was just a friendly guy.

 

*

A couple of weeks later, Minseok felt like he had reached a limbo between Luhan’s morning smiles and Jongdae’s persistent words to tell him. He had grown so numb to both in such a way it was almost starting to feel like things were going back to normal, back to before Luhan’s arrival.

 

It seemed as if that day, he was not so fortunate.

After morning classes were up and it was time for lunch break, Jongdae smiled evilly at him.

“What are you plotting, you devil?” he asked cautiously, glaring.  

“You’ll see.” he replied with a cat like smile, before going around his desk towards the other side of the room. Before he knew it, Jongdae had returned to Minseok’s seat, and the latter had not noticed he was no longer alone.

 

“Hey Minseok!” he heard Luhan’s voice say, bright cheerful and excited. He turned up, his heart still doing that stupid thing when he saw the, now pink haired, boy’s flawless smile. For some unknown reason, Luhan had told him he’d go to school on his own that morning, and now standing in front of him fully clad in his school uniform, slightly unbuttoned shirt, pink hair and make up, he didn’t dare look him in the eye. Luhan had even, for yet another inexplicable reason, _winked_ at Minseok as soon as he came in that morning. Jongdae must’ve caught sight of that as well.

“Hey, what’s up?” he answered, his eyes turning to Jongdae in question.

“I asked Luhan to eat lunch with us. Let’s go down to the cafeteria.” Jongdae smiled innocently, as if he hadn’t just shattered Minseok’s idea of a peaceful lunch.

 

Honestly, he didn’t even know how to behave.

They found spots around their usual table, his other friends occupying the rest of the seats. It was only Jongdae, Yixing, Sehun, and Baekhyun, and of course Luhan and Minseok, the former who sat immediately in front of him. The vibe was not at all awkward, all of them already familiar with each other, but it was still Luhan’s first time sitting with the group, or at least, his first time in the presence of Minseok. Minseok munched on his lunch, the metal of his chopsticks and spoon louder to his ears than normal. Luhan chatted casually with Baekhyun, the both of them sharing a seemingly loud and extroverted nature. A few times, Luhan looked towards him with his dark rimmed eyes as if waiting for him to jump into the conversation, to which Minseok would gaze down at his food as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.

 

Eventually, Minseok listened to the devil’s words, Jongdae’s intentions obvious with two questions alone.

 

“So, Luhan hyung, you’ve been traveling so much for a while, right? Why did you decide to come to school in Korea? It’s like the worst option.”

 

Minseok stiffened, his other friends chorusing Jongdae. He didn’t want to admit he was curious as well. Luhan seemed happy to be asked by the way his smile lifted his cheeks.

 

“Actually, I have a friend from a long time ago who lives in Korea. I was actually hoping to meet him here.” he said sheepishly. Minseok’s heart thundered and he looked down, using his spoon to scoop up some soup. Jongdae smiled at Luhan’s answer.

 

“Ah, that’s cool man, does he go here? What’s his name?” Jongdae asked again, trying to coax out the answer he wanted, mortifying Minseok in the process. Luhan’s eyes sparkled.

“I can’t believe it’s never occurred to me to ask around, but maybe you guys know him. His name is Xiumin?” he said, a hopeful tone in his voice.

 

Minseok stood perfectly still, almost holding his breath, Jongdae’s questioning stare directed right at him as he mentioned never meeting a Xiumin in his life, the rest of their friends stating the same, and Luhan smiling in disappointment.

 

Minseok didn’t bother to give his own input, his eyes burning.

 

He didn’t even notice when Luhan glanced at him sadly.

 

*

  
“You mean to tell me all this fuckin time, he’s never even known your name?!” Jongdae hissed at Minseok. It was very cloudy outside after school and Jongdae and Minseok skipped second homeroom and the rest of their studying. They were sitting in Jongdae’s room, his father being at work and his mother possibly shopping and about to return any moment. Minseok looked down, his hands tightly fisted on his knees, eyes reddening at the rims at the reprimanding tone in Jongdae’s voice. He looked up.

 

“I didn’t think we’d actually ever meet…” Minseok said, his eyes sad.

“Why did you tell him your name was Xiumin?” Jongdae questioned.

“W-When we started writing to each other, I was being taught about China. My teacher said our names might be difficult for kids who spoke fluent Mandarin, so she gave us Chinese names to use for our assignments in class…” Minseok said, remembering his old Chinese teacher. Jongdae sighed loudly.

“Ok, that makes sense, even though that’s fuckin stupid and Korean names aren’t that hard for Chinese people to pronounce……. but what I don’t understand is…. after all these years, why didn’t you bother telling him your _real_ name??” he questioned judgingly. It was honestly starting to hurt Minseok, who was already stressed out from the situation.

 

“Because! I’m a bad person, Jongdae! A bad person!!!  Why, why would someone like him want to meet someone like me????!” he nearly yelled, his voice cracking. Jongdae stiffened, stupified by Minseok’s outburst. The smaller boy stood up to face Jongdae fully.

“You’ve seen how he is, you know what kind of person he is. He’s smart, he’s friendly, he’s wordly, he makes everyone feel like friends, and most of all, he’s good. He’s a beautiful and good person who does as he’s told and doesn’t get in trouble and always sees the good side of everything,” he continued before Jongdae could argue. He laughed bitterly, the first few drops falling from his eyes, Jongdae gasping slightly, his expression turning pitiful at the sight.

“And me? I’m garbage, I have nothing to share, I have a boring life, I’m always breaking rules for no fuckin reason, with no future, no dreams, no expectations for themselves, I’m not even the best company…” Minseok continued, before looking straight into Jongdae’s eyes, “ And we’ve been friends for years but he doesn’t know, Jongdae. He doesn’t know what a horrible person I am. He never knew of all the trouble I get into. He was never supposed to show up. He was never supposed to know…..” he sobbed, looking down, tears freely cascading down his cheeks before raising his hands to bury his face in them.

 

Jongdae’s heart shattered, Minseok’s most major insecurities told to him from his own lips. Anyone who knows Kim Minseok knows he doesn’t cry easily. Almost like a rock, he rarely shows much emotion. To have his friends eyes overflow with painful tears was too much for Jongdae’s heart.

 

And taking pity of Minseok’s crushed spirit, Jongdae made Minseok sit down on the bed once more and took a seat next to him before wrapping his arms tightly around him in a comforting manner.

 

“You’re not a horrible person. You’re not any of those horrible things you think of yourself.” he told him sincerely. Minseok only continued to sob. After long minutes of silence with only the sound of Minseok’s sniffling and breathing, he was able to relax, his eyes swollen and darkened with a big grey cloud. Jongdae didn’t want to, but he had to get Minseok to stop bullshitting. Something like this was never supposed to be this dramatic. He had to encourage Minseok to not be afraid.

 

“You have to tell him, Minseok. You have to tell him how you feel.” he said cautiously.

 

But Minseok only continued to look ahead, not even trying to deny it anymore.

 

“Promise me you won’t say a word to anyone. Promise me you won’t interfere.” he asked monotonically.

“Min-”

“Promise me, Jongdae.” he asked more harshly. Jongdae sighed.

“Fine. I promise.”

____________________________________________________________________________

 

**PART II**

 

Luhan excitedly opened up his first letter from his assigned pen-pal in Korea. He smiled widely, eyes shrinking slightly as he read the huge, blue letters.

 

 _“Hello, Luhan, my name is Xiumin~ I’m 6 years old and I go to school in Korea. Where do you go to school? What’s your favorite color? Let’s be friends so we can play together someday!”_ he read the translation below loudly to himself in his room. He squealed, cheeks blushing slightly in excitement. Unable to contain himself, he ran to the kitchen, paper in hand and ran up behind his mother, who towered over him, and amused smile on her face as he chanted ‘mom, mom, mom, mom.’

 

“What is it Han?” she asked, making him smile more.

“I got a letter! I made a new friend from Korea! Look!” he pointed towards the letter. His mother dried her hands and crouched to Luhan’s eye level, reading the letter out loud from the Chinese translation below as well.

“Ah, this is from your assignment from school? That’s great, I’m happy you made a friend, darling.” she told him, patting his head.

 

He smiled widely, already planning on how to reply back.

 

*

Luhan went to school in a non-traditional way. He was homeschooled and a lot of the time he had to finish courses through the mail and eventually online if available many years later. He had spent his tenth and eleventh birthday’s in Europe, where his love for football blossomed even more. He had only tried to play seriously once, and heard of the term as football instead of soccer, from his summer in Korea in his younger years where he attended an academy to begin his courses in English. He was failing miserably because English wasn’t interesting at all to him, but he liked being in Korea alot. He made friends in that spanse of four weeks but eventually he had to travel once more with his parents.

 

Even so, He still kept many open P.O Boxes wherever he went. He continued using his father’s company’s sasoham box when in Asia to receive Xiumin’s letters, his pen-pal from Korea still writing to him.

 

Xiumin, sweet and gentle in nature, had become so important to Luhan. He himself had proposed they keep writing to each other after their assignments had been finished at the end of the school year. Maybe it was how lonely he had been, growing up as an only child, that didn’t make it easy to let go of Xiumin. He was quick to make friends but moving a lot didn’t make for many long term friends. He felt quite happy to know Xiumin also wanted to stay in touch with him, and so he bought a cool lock box to store his letters.

 

*

Luhan, at thirteen, had told Xiumin he felt a bit insecure about his face.

 

He could almost imagine how much Xiumin would laugh at him for it, but it honestly brought him down. Wherever he went, he would be praised for being ‘so pretty’ he could almost pass for a girl. He had never wanted to be pretty. Everyone he admired had toned, strong bodies and six packs and were sometimes even a bit too crude, and so he played the manliest sports with his short term friends trying to achieve that as well. It only seemed to backfire, people calling him girlish nicknames as a means to praise him, such as ‘The Flower striker’ or ‘The Beautiful Ace’ or something. It was all flattering and not unkind at all. He should’ve been happy. But he wasn’t.

 

 _“Idiot, why would you need to be insecure of your face? I’d kill for a face like yours. If I were as beautiful as you, I’d probably be the most popular guy in school and everyone would be dying to go out with me. Anyway, don’t think too much about it! Why should you care what anyone thinks anyway, you’re awesome and your face is just a plus. And if you still feel bad for being pretty, Mr. Flower boy, if anyone tells you you’re pretty enough to be a girl, kick their asses, that’ll show them your manliness!”_ Xiumin replied to his letter weeks later. He was in Madrid, and the hot sun paled in comparison to Xiumin’s words asking him to not worry about things unnecessarily.

 

His heart swelled.

Xiumin thought he was beautiful.

He didn’t know exactly why that made him so happy when from any other person it would be an insult.

 

*

“Han you have a letter!” he heard his father say. He nearly tripped over his own feet trying to reach his father, who stood by a chair in their temporary home in Los Angeles. He had been waiting for Xiumin to reply to him for a few weeks now, and he was giddy, his now bleach blonde hair bouncing as he sprinted,  the California sun shining down through the living room. His father smiled at a fifteen year old Luhan and ‘Tsked’ affectionately.

 

“Can you save that for later? I invited an old friend to have dinner with us tonight.” he stated, removing the vest from his suit. Luhan curiously eyed his father. They so rarely had guests in their temporary homes that weren’t strictly related to his job.

 

“I didn’t know you had friends, dad.” he spoke his thoughts teasingly. His father wacked him upside the head.

“Have respect for your father, Han,” he said, an audible ‘ow’ heard from Luhan as his mother walked in, “And I have friends, thank you very much.” he said matter of factly. Luhan rolled his eyes, muttering a ‘whatever’ under his breath, his hands itching to open the envelope in his hands. His father wacked him upside the head one more time to get his attention.

“Ow! What was that for?!” he whined.

“Go make yourself presentable.” he ordered.

 

Luhan ran to get ready, hand clutching Xiumin’s letter.

 

*

Their guest turned out to be one of his father’s old friends from University. They had apparently met during his father’s exchange in Korea, both attending Seoul National University. It was impressive, especially since he learned from his father’s friend during dinner how competitive it was to apply as an exchange student at SNU. It was even more impressive that his father’s friend, though Korean, spoke fluent Mandarin. Their talks eventually turned boring, for him anyway, his parents happily talking about things irrelevant to him. The only thing he caught was that his father’s friend was in Los Angeles for business. After that, his hand kept wondering to the still sealed envelope with his name on it. He was supposed to leave it in his room but he couldn’t do it, too eager to read it’s contents. Eventually his father caught sight of his fidgeting.

 

“Han, can you put that away?” he said, not really angry, more amused than anything really. His father was aware of his enthusiasm and scolded him lightly, Luhan apologizing immediately. He heard gentle laughter from the other man.

“That’s quite alright, Lu Jie,” the man stated. Luhan sheepishly smiled in thanks.

“What do you have there son?” he asked the younger kindly. Luhan tried not to blush.

“It’s just a letter from a friend of mine. We’ve been pen-pals since we were little.” he said, sheepishly,  cringing slightly for over sharing. The man’s face seemed to brighten in understanding.

“That’s interesting. My son is around your age, and he has a penpal too, from his primary school days I think. I don’t know too much about it, but his mother tells me his friend was from China. What a coincidence, right?” he said.

 

Luhan, on the other hand, was very, very curious. In countless occasions, he had to hold himself back on asking too many personal questions about his friend. He waited patiently for Xiumin to tell him more about his life, what his parents did, what he was studying, etc. But he only ever told him deeper things, thoughts, feelings, strange ideas and to some extent, dreams he may have. As much as he appreciated the comfort and trust, Luhan was very curious to know more.

 

And he was especially curious about seeing Xiumin’s face.

But what were the odds of this being his friends father?

Would that be fate if it were?

It couldn’t be right?

 

“Really?? What’s your son’s name if I may ask, sir?” he politely inquired.

“My son’s name is Minseok. Kim Minseok.” he stated. Luhan visibly deflated, but before he could say it wasn’t his friend, the man continued, “In his primary Chinese language class though, I’m quite sure he had a different name. Xiaomin or Xiumin or something like that I believe.”

 

Luhan held his breath for a second, speaking a few more sentences in understanding before allowing them to continue their own conversation, mind overflowing with ideas. It was fate right? There had to be a catch.  

 

*

 

“Pleaseeee, pleasseeeeeeeeeeeee!” he begged his father.

 

His father laughed loudly, almost cruelly at his son’s suffering. It had been almost two months since his father’s friend’s visit, and ever since, Luhan had been pestering his father to ask his friend to send him pictures of Xiumin. Or Minseok as he learned his son was called.

 

“Why would I do that?” his father asked coldly, his legs crossed as he sat on the couch, staring condescendingly at his son. Luhan glared.

“Dad! This is important! What if his son really is my friend? I mean I know it sounds dumb, but what if it is?!  He’s never even sent me a picture, I want to see what he looks like!” he confessed. His father argued back about boundaries and privacy. They continued to bicker until with an exasperated sigh, he gave in.

“Alright, fine, _fine_! But stop-- just stop bothering me, you’re worse than your mother when she wants shoes.” he said, taking his phone out. Luhan smiled widely, hugging his father, promising his father he’d have the best grades in his courses if he managed to get what he wanted.

“There, now all you can do is wait for him to reply. And you promised young man. I expect to see nothing but triple digits for all your exams.”

 

“Yes, sir.” he saluted.

 

It took around two days for his father to come up to him as he was studying in the dinner table, boxes and things arranged in piles around him. He had an exam before they were to fly off to France, and he needed to pass his courses before that.

 

“Let me see your marks, Luhan.” he asked. Luhan complied easily, still distracted. His father smiled at his high grades.

“Good, I guess since you kept your end of the deal, I’ll keep mine. Minkyung sent me a few pictures. I’ll forward them to you.” he said, walking away.

 

Luhan’s eyes widened, hand immediately going to his phone that had been sitting next to him. He turned it off as to not be distracted, and before he could fully grab it, his father had walked back and snatched it away.

 

“BUT FIRST, FINISH YOUR EXAM!” his father scolded.

 

Luhan pouted, more motivated to finish as soon as possible.

 

*

 

Luhan looked at Minseok’s side profile as they rode the bus to school together.

 

As Minseok stared out the window, his face stoic as always, Luhan got lost in the curve of his cheeks, the length of his lashes, his dark eyes and cute nose. The darkness of the early morning didn’t dull Minseok’s bright dirty brown-blonde hair and beautiful skin.

 

He tried averting his eyes somewhere else but he couldn’t do it. Even when he didn’t want to seem so obvious, his eyes still looked towards Minseok.

 

When Luhan had arrived in Korea and was greeted by his fathers friend, Kim Minkyung, his heart beat wildly in his chest at the prospect of meeting Xiumin in person. He knew he was probably setting himself up for a major disappointment, assuming way too hard Xiumin and Minseok could be the same person, but he was wishing so badly they were. If so, then Luhan wouldn’t be in love with a complete stranger.

 

A while back when his father had sent him the pictures his friend shared with him of his son, Luhan was enamored so quickly. He knew it from the moment he saw those round cheeks and cat like eyes. He knew it when picture after picture, his face heated up massively after seeing a gummy smile and delicate features. The person in the photographs, Kim Minseok, was so, so devastatingly cute. So tragically beautiful, that if it turned out it wasn’t his friend Xiumin, he’d be devastated.

 

After all, he would know nothing of a beautiful stranger, and he’d be betraying his affection for the soul of his best friend, the same soul he had fallen in love with years before.

 

His father at the end of the previous summer had completed his promise. He told Luhan the year prior that his company was thinking of offering him a promotion on a higher department than his current position in the company, one that needed a stay in Korea for a longer than usual period of time. When his father accepted, he had been asked to complete a few last jobs, train for his new position and relocate indefinitely to Korea, taking his family with him. Luhan, ecstatic on being closer to Xiumin, had asked his father to, as a favor, place him in the same school as his friend’s son in order to confirm his hunch. He didn’t know then Minseok himself would be the one to lead him to his first day of school.

 

Meeting him in the flesh was different from seeing pictures. Luhan had been so struck by Minseok’s perfect face and beauty, he didn’t even have the capacity of blushing. When Minseok’s face turned a sweet shade of red for an inexplicable reason, Luhan almost cried. He was _so_ cute. So, so, _so_ cute.

 

Ever since, Luhan had tried to gain Minseok’s attention, but it seemed as if the more he tried, the less interested the boy was in his friendship. Nearly four months after his first day of school, Minseok’s continuous chilly attitude and unimpressed face seemed to taunt Luhan’s effort.

 

Luhan also realized how rebellious Minseok was. Though they always went to school together, he rarely spotted him in first homeroom, sometimes coming in for the last class before lunch. A few times on his own way home, he’d spot him with the same three boys, causing trouble, even seeing them get into fights. The other boys seemed more reckless and naughty, but it was obvious to Luhan’s eyes that Minseok was their ring leader, seeking his permission and following him around, with an always calm attitude and poker face. They seemed to be clever enough to avoid the school knowing of all the trouble they’d get into and he had no doubt that was all Minseok’s doing. Minseok was smart, his participation minimal in classes, but triple digit marks in everything made up for it. Though over time it decreased and he spotted Minseok more normally around school, it was hard to forget.

 

Luhan himself had yet to confirm whether his friend Xiumin and Minseok were the same person. Seeing Minseok’s constant streak of trouble, he looked back at his letters for details from Xiumin on his own school life, finding none that could match this kind of trouble. After his arrival in Korea, in where Luhan had mailed Xiumin, asking him what school he attended and if he was interested in meeting up, Xiumin simply stopped replying to his letters.

 

Heart broken and suspicious day by day, Luhan would watch Minseok’s smile from a safe enough distance, while the former sat with his friend, a boy named Jongdae, and sadly wished he could look his way.  

 

*

“Luhan oppa, I-If you’re not busy, would you, like to- um, w-would you like to go see a movie with me?” a shy feminine voice said to him. Luhan blinked down, feeling bad for yet another dongsaeng.

 

“I’m very sorry, Yoobin-ah, but I’m already interested in someone else.” he rejected kindly, but firmly. The young girl looked down, her face a deep shade of red and tears in her eyes, she sighed, sniffling.

 

“T-That’s ok, oppa--” she sobbed before making a run for it.

 

Luhan looked after her for a moment feeling bad, before walking away to his own class, his hands tucked into the pockets of his dark school slacks. No matter how many times he rejected girls and even the occasional boy (though more secretly and definitely not in school), he still felt kind of fucked up. He just didn’t want to be a hypocrite and make them believe something that wasn’t real. He had never had this sort of thing happen to him, being homeschooled, obviously, but he didn’t let it get to his head. There was no point when no one else seemed to make him feel a thing.

 

He walked towards his classroom and his eyes immediately looked for Minseok, who was sitting alone on his desk for once. He leaned against the doors frame, trying not to block anyone’s way as he stared at the small boy. Minseok’s face looked serene and filled with emotion, something he hadn’t seen before. He was concentrating on a few papers on his desk, his bangs falling slightly over his eyes, brushing his cheeks delicately. Luhan sighed. He had always hated romantic and cliche crap, but he couldn’t help the sick-in-love sighs that came out when around Minseok.

 

Suddenly, Luhan caught sight of something, watching as Minseok folded his papers.

 

On his first letter to Xiumin after settling in Korea, Luhan had specifically picked a bright and attention grabbing envelope in a bright teal color. He wasn’t dumb to think the color alone would be enough to set it  apart from the rest, also deciding to put a huge, fancy L with lots of little drawings on the outside in the front of the envelope, and an X surrounded with flowers and leaves at the back in decor, a lot of stupid stickers too just to make it bright and lively and colorful. It was a lot of unique stickers he had with him from around the world, from theme parks and tourist attractions he had collected, too. It was childish, yes, but he figured if it would be the only way to confirm Minseok was Xiumin by seeing him with his letter, he could be a little extra. He was discouraged in realizing many weeks passed by then, and he never once spotted Minseok with the envelope, but it never stopped him either, in effort or on being on the look out.

 

But this was it. This was the moment he had been waiting for, watching Minseok’s delicate fingers place the papers he now realized were his own letter back in the unmistakable envelope, heart nearly exploding with joy and face moving on it’s own into a smile to match. He suddenly dropped his eager smile altogether when in horrible disappointment he realized one thing.

 

Did Minseok know it was Luhan all along and never said anything?

 

He was about to walk over to confront Minseok, but their homeroom teacher walked in on that moment, signaling it was time for class to begin.

 

His blood boiled, walking in, eyes fixated on Minseok who innocently blinked up after spotting him, indifference taking over his face as he turned away. Luhan furrowed his brows and took one long stride towards him, doubting his own self control before the teacher spoke up.

 

“Luhan, hurry and take a seat.” he insisted.

 

Luhan fumed, walking away.

 

It was time to take some serious, drastic action.

 

*

Ok so Luhan was an actual idiot and didn’t have a clue how to proceed with his new found knowledge, figuring this was good enough.

 

Skipping their usual morning meet up, he walked into school alone, feeling everyone’s eyes on him. He really couldn’t blame them, after all, he was trying way too hard.

_Could this be considered peacocking?_ he wondered to himself stupidly.

 

He confidently walked into class, his uniform shirt slightly unbuttoned. But the real hook was his brand new and stylish pink hair. He wore a single earring as well that dangled prettily, and his eyes were styled with dark eyeshadow and eyeliner. He looked very good, if he did say so himself. He had spent the night researching what was considered attractive in males in Korea, and ended up in a bunch of music videos and hair tutorials, ulzzang’s, etc. He found it all pretty cool, interesting even, so he decided to put practice on his new knowledge and see if this would appeal to Minseok’s taste. He couldn’t be sure, but he wouldn’t know if he didn’t try, right?

 

Xiumin, or Minseok as he now knows, had countlessly complimented Luhan’s face in his letters. He decided he’d use that against him. But after the hair and the make up and the flashy accessories, he was a bit lost and hoped this could at least be a proper ice breaker.

 

Walking through his classrooms door, he heard the gasps go around him.

“Oh my god, Luhan-ssi you look so good!” he heard a few of his female classmates say.

“Yeah you look like an idol, You’re gonna get scouted like this.” a male classmate said playfully. Luhan smiled and rolled his eyes good naturedly. He immediately glanced towards Minseok’s desk, catching the boys eyes.

 

Luhan thought this was it. Before Minseok could avert his gaze, Luhan smiled brightly and deciding it wouldn’t hurt, and with a thundering heart, he dared to wink at him before turning away, desperately trying not to turn and gauge the others reaction.

 

If he had turned, however, he would’ve seen Minseok’s tomato red blush.

 

*

Luhan stood outside Jongdae’s house, pondering his life choices.

 

Today, he had been very happy when Jongdae had asked him to sit with them during lunch, the both of them walking towards where Minseok sat, putting his things away. He didn’t seem too entranced with his new look and it was uneventful on the way there. Luhan tried to walk next to the smaller boy, but Minseok would always either slow down or speed up. Luhan pouted to himself, but he didn’t mind. He had a full hour with Minseok and his friends. He decided to take a chance and as they had been sitting, he chose the seat immediately across from Minseok.  

 

But even after having the bravery to bring up Xiumin in front of him, Minseok’s lack of response only crushed his heart further.

 

Which is why he skipped after lunch classes in order to find Jongdae. He knew Jongdae. He had only been to his place once, they had a project together a month or two back. Walking the route towards his house, he wondered what the hell he was doing. If Minseok knew all along who Luhan was, if he knew they had been eachothers pen-pals for a long time, and he still chose to say nothing, then it was possible he had not been at all interested on being friends with Luhan. The thought alone made his eyes droop and his face pinch at the pain in his heart increasing.

 

Had it all been a lie?

Did Minseok ever thought they were friends at all?

Or had it been in Luhan’s head all along?

It had been him to request they keep writing after all. Maybe after all this time, Luhan had only been a pest Minseok didn’t know how to get rid of. Huffing and walking faster with the cold nip of air threatening to bring late spring rain, he couldn’t believe it. Minseok had shared so much with him. Or maybe he had shared all lies.

 

He huffed annoyed. He needed help and the only person who could help him was Jongdae.

 

Walking up to the door, he knocked a few times before a woman he recognized as Jongdae’s mother opened up, a startled look turning to a smile quickly.

“Luhan-ah, hello.” she said to him as she opened the door fully. He bowed politely before speaking.

“Hello, is Jongdae here? I have some things to give to him he forgot at school.” he lied easily. The woman walked slowly towards another room, a set of stairs on the side.

“He’s upstairs in his room with Minseok. I’ll let him know you’re here.” she said almost walking up the stairs before Luhan stopped her.

“T-That’s ok! I can find my way. Thank you!” he said politely bowing again. She smiled at him, undoubtedly at his good manners, as he went up.

 

Luhan decided Jongdae, who was the only person he knew was truly close to Minseok, would be the only person who could help him. He wanted to tell him about their whole story, hoping he’d get Minseok to at least admit to Jongdae about it before he could confront him himself. But he was scared shitless that Jongdae also would think he’s pathetic and he and Minseok would just laugh coldly at his lame attempts to corner Minseok. Before he could think himself out of it, he walked right up to Jongdae’s door. Realization hit him as soon as he heard two voices coming from within, Minseok being there as well and regretted his hasty and possibly wrong choice, until he was interrupted by Jongdae’s voice.

 

 _"You mean to tell me all this fuckin time, he’s never even known your name?!”_ he heard Jongdae ask, anger in his tone.

 _"I didn’t think we’d actually ever meet…”_ Minseok replied with an insecure and thin voice. Luhan gasped silently. He knew he should turn away. He knew he should leave. But he couldn’t. Not when he thought he could finally hear what he had been waiting for.  

 _“Why did you tell him your name was Xiumin?”_ Jongdae questioned. Luhan, who was now pressing his ear cautiously to the door, was curious as well about that. It would’ve saved him so much trouble.  

 _“W-When we started writing to each other, I was being taught about China. My teacher said our names might be difficult for kids who spoke fluent Mandarin, so she gave us Chinese names to use for our assignments in class…”_ he replied to Jongdae, who sighed loudly.

 

So that explained why. It wasn’t unheard of. They had asked them in his own class to change their names to a Korean name, but Luhan’s name was easy to pronounce. He kept his on purpose.

 _“Ok, that makes sense, even though that’s fuckin stupid and Korean names aren’t that hard for Chinese people to pronounce……. but what I don’t understand is…. after all these years, why didn’t you bother telling him your real_ _name??”_ he questioned, understandingly so.

 

 _“Because! I’m a bad person, Jongdae! A bad person!!!”_ Minseok screamed suddenly. Luhan’s eyes widened.

 _“Why, why would someone like him want to meet someone like me????!”_ he heard the smaller yell, his voice cracking, _“You’ve seen how he is, you know what kind of person he is. He’s smart, he’s friendly, he’s wordly, he makes everyone feel like friends, and most of all, he’s good. He’s a beautiful and good person who does as he’s told and doesn’t get in trouble and always sees the good side of everything,”_ Minseok said, his voice thick with emotion and admiration and Luhan furiously blushed. He didn’t hate him after all? His heart threatened to break out of his chest, but before he could celebrate he heard a bitter laugh that could only belong to Minseok.

 _“And me? I’m garbage, I have nothing to share, I have a boring life, I’m always breaking rules for no fuckin reason, with no future, no dreams, no expectations for themselves, I’m not even the best company. And we’ve been friends for years but he doesn’t know, Jongdae. He doesn’t know what a horrible person I am. He never knew of all the trouble I get into. He was never supposed to show up. He was never supposed to know…..”_ Minseok sobbed, cutting off whatever else he could say.

 

Was this a fuckin joke? Luhan’s mouth wide open and his eyebrows furrowed in Confusion. Since when the hell did Minseok think so badly of himself? Since when had he not seen how valuable his life was to Luhan?

 

It was taking all his self control not to open the door. Minseok might not forgive him for eavesdropping. But resisting was so agonizing. It was a few moments later as he struggled with himself that he heard Jongdae speak.

 

 _“You’re not a horrible person. You’re not any of those horrible things you think of yourself.”_ he told him sincerely. Minseok only continued to sob. After long minutes of silence with only the sound of Minseok’s sniffling and breathing, Jongdae spoke again.

 

 _“You have to tell him, Minseok. You have to tell him how you feel.”_ he said cautiously. Luhan was very thankful for Jongdae. He wasn’t close with him but he could see how close he was with Minseok. Secretly, he felt his heart had burned in jealousy but at the moment after hearing his encouragement to Minseok, he only felt relief someone like Jongdae was Minseok’s friend.

 _“Promise me you won’t say a word to anyone. Promise me you won’t interfere.”_ he heard Minseok demand.

_“Min-”_

_“Promise me, Jongdae.”_ he asked more harshly. Jongdae sighing.

_“Fine. I promise.”_

 

Luhan’s eyes watered slightly, his eyebrows still furrowed, focused on the doorknob.

 

He could. He could just open the door and confront the source of his heartache. He could do it and make him admit everything. He wouldn’t be able to deny it.

 

But, instead, he sighed defeatedly, pulling his arm back towards himself and walking away.

 

**PART III**

**_________**

 

The days after their short school break were a bit odd to Minseok.

 

He found Luhan,  who had always so eagerly accompanied him to school in the morning’s had already arrived to school on his own on their first day back, his Pink hair traded for a light brown. Minseok thought of asking him why, but after the whole ordeal in Jongdae’s room, he figured it was a blessing in disguise. At first, he figured Luhan had something up his sleeve again, just as he had had on the day he changed his hair for a few days before their break.

 

But the next day, and the day after, and many more days later, Luhan no longer showed up to meet up with Minseok on the bus stop to school as he normally had the past few months. Minseok spotted him one morning being dropped off by the same sleek car he saw him in for the first time when they met in person. It saddened Minseok, but he had endured having Luhan’s presence unnerve him since he arrived. He could get through this too, he figured.

 

It wasn’t just the change in their morning routine, Luhan’s smile and voice absent in his early mornings, that was different. As the days passed by, turning into weeks, Luhan’s attitude towards Minseok also seemed to have changed.

 

He had always been a talker, and engaged quickly in conversation with everyone, especially with Minseok who in the past responded with one worded replies and casual cold answers to questions. Minseok felt safe in that, setting a barrier to protect his own feelings. But now, Luhan rarely went out of his way to engage Minseok in any way. Whenever there needed to be an interaction between the two, Luhan would speak coolly, formal, calculated and not longer than necessary. At first it had shocked Minseok. But seeing Luhan’s cold eyes gave way to realize one thing.

 

Luhan didn’t seem to be too interested in Minseok anymore.

 

Jongdae, sharp as always, seemed to pick that up immediately and pointed it out to him one day as they had lunch outside alone.

 

“What happened? Did you tell him?”

“I didn’t… and I don’t know, honestly.” Minseok answered. Jongdae pursed his lips.

“He wasn’t this way towards you before. He was always so happy and eager to talk to you and now, it’s as if you don’t exist to him….” he said mostly to himself. But Minseok heard and his eyes prickled in realization before he laughed.

“Maybe he realized it all on his own. It can happen, you know.” he answered, looking at Jongdae as convincingly ok as possible. The latter only scoffed.

“Shut your mouth before I do it for you. I told you to cut it the hell out putting yourself down like that.” he scolded seriously. Minseok laughed, truly amused and also content to know someone still cared for him. He saw Jongdae’s eyes focus behind him.

“Speak of the devil..” he said lowly. Minseok turned slightly, trying not to seem too obvious.

 

He spotted Luhan, of course but he was surprised to see a huge bright smile on his face. He adored that smile, he even felt like he hadn’t seen it in so long. He then spotted a guy next to Luhan as well, a matching smile on his face and a soccer ball under his other arm, the two talking amicably and closely, their arms brushing slightly.

“Who’s that?” Minseok asked Jongdae.

“Ah, I think that’s Han Daekyu. He’s not in our class but I think he’s the captain of the soccer club. He’s pretty popular, I’m surprised you don’t know him.” Jongdae answered matter of factly. Minseok rolled his eyes.

“I could care less about how popular he is.” he answered, his gaze turning back to Luhan. He saw as the other guy threw his arm around Luhan’s shoulders, Minseok’s insides immediately twisting.

 

It hadn’t occurred to him before that there could be someone else seriously chasing Luhan. He could just be friends with him too, Minseok supposed, but that didn’t mean someone else wasn’t taking away Minseok’s spot in Luhan’s heart…... if there had been one in the first place.

“Have they always been this close?” he asked Jongdae. Jongdae looked at Minseok’s face as he gazed at the two boys. His eyes looked sad, and a hint of jealousy in them told Jongdae all he needed to know.

“I guess so, Luhan did join the soccer club after all.” he answered honestly, because sugar coating was not his style.

 

Minseok continued to watch, wishing Luhan would turn like he always had in the past. Normally while playing soccer, Luhan had always sprinted up to Minseok and asked if he had watched him score, if he wanted to play.

 

But as he watched the two boys start running towards the field, Luhan never once turning, he realized he wouldn’t be doing that anymore.

 

His heart shattered but he refused to cry.

“Let’s get out of here, Dae.”

 

*

It was almost there, the dreaded day of all the days in the school year as the second thursday of November was about to hit everyone at full force.

 

It was almost time for the CSAT’s.

 

Minseok wasn’t nervous, he was mostly just tired. Of his fathers grilling, of his mother’s encouraging pressure, of his sister telling him to study a bit more seriously.

 

He knew it was all leading up to this moment where all the studying for years of school would reward their parents for the millions of won spent and invested in lessons and schools, the countless hours of no sleep and for all the calculated studying of years would pay off.

 

To those who cared anyway.

 

Minseok sat in his seat after lunch, going over some material. He may not be afraid of the test that Korea determined your entire future with, but he was eager to finally shut his father up. He had confidence in his brain. Even if his schooling seemed to be only satisfactory, he had full confidence in his ability. And if he were to fail, Minseok was content in knowing he couldn’t care less. He had a life to live that didn’t require people’s acceptance or approval. If he didn’t succeed in Korea, he’d just move elsewhere and live freely.

 

As he looked up, he saw Luhan passing out convenience store snacks. The tired and stressed out faces of his classmates all looked towards Luhan in admiration and gratitude. Luhan looked just as serene as Minseok himself, and the latter smiled slightly. Luhan didn’t seem to care too much about the test either. It seemed to be a thing they had in common. But when Luhan was approaching closer, Minseok tried his best to look busy, to not disturb Luhan, who had been minding his own business this whole time. He heard footsteps approaching his seat and the clearing of a throat made him turn up immediately. Luhan stood there, not visibly awkward, his eyes big and face calm, but his eyebrows showed he looked a bit nervous.

“Um… I know everyone’s studying hard so I brought these….” he placed a triangle Kimbap in Minseok’s desk and a can of iced coffee. Minseok looked at it and then at Luhan with wide eyes.

“T-Thank you..” he said, cursing himself for stuttering. Luhan smiled politely.

“No problem. Good luck Xiumin...” he said, his eyes widening immediately after saying that. Minseok’s own eyes widened, heart skipping.

“W-what?????” he asked, his voice an octave higher. Luhan’s face was bright red.

“U-Um I-I Mean, Minseok! Good luck Minseok! Sorry!! I’m just---! Bye!!!” he said as he turned away towards the door.

 

But Minseok heard it loud and clear and there was no denying it now.

 

Luhan had said his chinese name.

 

Luhan knew it was Minseok.

 

He had known it all along.

 

*

“I’m an idiot. A fuckin IDIOT.” Luhan said to himself as he splashed water in his face in the school bathroom. Of course after all this time of giving Minseok the space he undoubtedly needed, he just had to do something to give himself away. He almost pulled out all the hair in his head when he heard the laughter of his friend echo through the bathroom.

“What are you talking about? You said yourself he knew you were his friend, why would it be so weird?” Daekyu said. Daekyu was handsome. He was tall and toned and apparently he wanted to be a singer or soccer player. He befriended Luhan after he joined the soccer club and the two became great friends.

 

“Because he didn’t know I knew it was him….” Luhan said to him, deflated. He was annoyed. Daekyu had been the only person Luhan trusted his and Minseok’s story with because Luhan just couldn’t stand keeping it to himself any longer. He didn’t divulge the true nature of his feelings for Minseok, knowing it would be too taboo for homophobic Korea, but Daekyu was sharp and non-judgemental and he immediately figured Luhan out, encouraging him. Luhan couldn’t be happier he finally made an actual friend.

“Honestly, you two are so dumb. You don’t have to shout to high heavens how you feel about each other, but you’re both so dumb, Han. I’ve seen that kid around and he looks at you in the exact same way you look at him when you think he’s not looking anymore. You’re both wasting your time avoiding this all together.” he scolded Luhan. Luhan looked up at him and sighed.

“I…. don’t really have the courage to let him know anymore. He doesn’t seem to want to be friends with me anyway…..I mean I was trying to give him some space but here I go…. messing things up again….” he told his friend dejectedly. Daekyu saw Luhan’s sad face and smiled. Luhan was so innocent. He was almost girlish to him, but that didn’t make him hate Luhan. It just made him sad because he saw the desperation on Luhan’s face. An idea popped into his head immediately. He walked closer to the Chinese boy and ruffled his hair.

“You’re an idiot but I think the Suneung test is giving everyone a lot of trouble so it’s ok. What do you say we play some football?” he asked casually. Luhan looked up at him, puzzled.

 

“Football?”

Daekyu smiled brightly.

 

*

From what Minseok gathered, a kid in another class started rounding up people early morning to play a friendly game after classes. Many people scoffed, asking why anyone would want to do such a thing when the biggest exam of their life would happen the day after. Minseok on the other hand thought it sounded fun, and so he and his group of friends decided to show up in the end.

 

“Who’d be nuts enough to do this anyway?” Baekhyun asked.

“I don’t know but I like them already,” Jongdae added laughing.

“At least we know someone’s not a stiff pain in the ass around here.” Minseok stated calmly, his hands in his pockets. He was wearing dark grey sweatpants and a white oversized t-shirt, a Black Nike cap on his head. The soccer club was all there of course, but there was a surprising amount of people who weren’t in the club for this considering they should be studying. A lot of hearty talking and teasing around, mostly boys, only a few girls sitting in the grass of the field since most were probably studying.

 

Eventually two familiar figures sprinted up, clad in casual shorts and soccer jerseys from the school’s team. Minseok’s heart sped up seeing Luhan’s hair bouncing slightly as he ran along with the guy he had seen him with before.

“Thanks for showing up everyone. I know this seems like a silly idea but we’re here to cheer each other on right? Let’s relieve some stress before the big test tomorrow by playing a little contest, just for fun.” Han Daekyu declared loudly, the club cheering wildly in content. Minseok was starting to regret showing up a little, but seeing Luhan’s smile as he cheered with the other team members, he decided it was worth it.

“What do you mean by contest? Are we doing versus in teams?” Jongdae asked curiously, his arms crossed.

“Nope, we’ll be doing one on one, fast little drills. Consider it a small world cup. There’s plenty of us to make it happen. Short rounds, timed, and mostly based on one goal alone.”  Daekyu explained. Minseok listened intently trying to get the gist of it. So it would be everyone versus everyone. He looked towards Luhan and saw his face focused. Minseok sighed. He prayed they wouldn’t go against each other, hoping either he or Luhan lost in the process of it all.

“Give it your best everyone let’s go!” Daekyu said loudly everyone cheering after.

 

As they all quickly chose numbers, Minseok getting the Number 16 while Luhan ended with the number 23, the game started and slowly, everyone was knocked off from best to worst. Jongdae and the others tried their best and along with Minseok, kicked and dribbled around their opponents. Minseok knocked out 5 people himself, earning him a spot in the top 8, Jongdae, Chanyeol and Baekhyun along side him. Luhan and Daekyu also made it to the top 8.

 

Eventually, as Jongdae tried his damnest to defeat Daekyu, Minseok realized as far as things went, he would face off Luhan if he managed to win his next game. His heart beating quickly in fear. He didn’t want to. Not with the way things were between them, awkward and cold, and it would be hard regardless of the outcome. His instinct told him he had to win no matter what but his heart told him he should just turn around and leave before Luhan would hate him for that too.

 

Watching Chanyeol lose to Luhan, he realized if he didn’t defeat Daekyu he wouldn’t face Luhan at all.

But he couldn’t do it. Daekyu, in Minseok’s eyes, stole Luhan’s affection from him. He was being selfish and in all honesty immature, being the real reason why the two of them couldn’t be closer than they could be, really, but he had to do it. He had to defeat him.

 

As he stared at his opponent a couple of feet away from him, the coldness in his cat like eyes showing through, he saw Daekyu’s smile directed towards him.

“Let’s see if you can defeat me, Kim Minseok.” he taunted.

 

Minseok’s blood boiled immediately.

 

*

 

“I…. can’t fuckin believe you beat the captain of the team….” Chanyeol said to Minseok. They were sitting down taking a quick break. Minseok’s heart beating a thousand miles an hour, his face and hair and neck covered in sweat as he struggled to catch his breath. He was dying. He was certain of it. His heart was about to take a trip and it was preparing to run away as far as possible without his body.

 

“I was just lucky I guess….” he said between pants, unable to believe it himself. Everyone had looked amazedly as Minseok dashed at full speed towards Daekyu earlier, his movements fast and calculating. He even threw in some amazing footwork, scoring an impressive two goals against the skilled captain. After his defeat, Daekyu didn’t look at all surprised, or even bothered, if anything he looked extremely pleased.

 

“I absolutely hate you, Kim.” he had said to him after, placing a hand over Minseok’s shoulder. Minseok, panting, had looked up in confusion.

“Where the hell did you hide all of high school? We could’ve been champions with you in the team. That’s too bad.” he teased. Minseok had smiled, laughed and stood up.

“Too bad.” he teased back.

 

But coming back to reality, Minseok realized he only had one more person standing in his way.

 

Daekyu called attention to himself and others as everyone surrounded the field, making a wider space.

“Ok!!! This is the final match! After this, you get to know what you win as your prize. Give it your best!”

 

As Minseok ran his hands through his hair, he saw Luhan’s extremely focused face watching him.

He walked right to the middle, the two standing face to face dramatically as everyone silently watched. It was a friendly game, but to Minseok this felt like it was it. It was the moment he had been debating with himself with for months. He decided for an ultimatum, completely tired emotionally and physically.

 

If he won, he’d leave everything as is. He wouldn’t dare mess up Luhan’s life with his presence. He would continue on with his life and not look back in regret.

 

But if he lost, he would give up that mentality. He would confront Luhan. He would face his biggest fear and let the other know everything before they both moved on with their lives.

 

He wanted the first more than the second, but deep inside, he wondered if fate would make Luhan fight for it. Fight for the sake of hearing him out. He decided he’d see if Fate would make Luhan play his best against him too.

 

Luhan looked at him with the same concentrated face.

 

“I know we’re both tired,” Luhan spoke, “But let’s give it our best. How about it, Minseok?”

 

Minseok shivered hearing Luhan say his name. He nodded and narrowed his eyes at the other.

“Ok.” he simply said. He heard a whistle and Daekyu’s voice telling them it was time to start before both of them rushed to the ball that had been placed in the center at unbelievable speed.

 

Minseok ran quicker, he stole the ball first before heading off past Luhan towards his target, quick and agile. Luhan turned, matching him step by step before he effectively blocked him and his attempts. He shot the ball at the goal thinking he had a chance since there was no goalie, but Luhan was wicked fast too, jumping up and kicking the ball off it’s path towards the other end, making the two of them run to catch it, eyes narrowed and legs galloping like stallions.

 

Jongdae and the others watched in fascination watching the two play to the fullest.

“Holy crap, I didn’t know Minseok was that fast.” he commented, watching as Luhan stole the ball from Minseok and ran with the other running right beside him, sliding to steal the ball, an impressive jump aiding him to take it back before it was stolen again.

“Really? He’s played for a while. Damn Luhan is really fast too, I’m glad I’m not either of those two” Chanyeol said, his ego bruised from losing.

“No, I knew he was fast but not _that_ fast holy shit-- look! Look at them go!”

 

Daekyu watched with satisfaction a battle he didn’t think he’d see. Luhan and the object of his affection going at it one on one. He had expected differently, thinking the two would be too tame, sweet and shy to each other because of their obvious feelings, but was pleased seeing the complete opposite, two people who played with so much fire, it was actually ridiculous.

 

“It’s getting late! One goal is all that’s needed for this victory!” he shouted.

 

Luhan huffed, watching as Minseok ran up to him to steal the ball again. His heart fluttered seeing Minseok’s face covered in sweat and muddy patches on his cheeks and clothes, his cap long forgotten, but his eyes, those sharp, wide, beautiful eyes were looking at him in concentration, determined and firey. And he had dreamt of this so much he didn’t think it would be too bad losing, knowing he could get this reaction out of Minseok. But he had to win. He had to win. To Luhan, this was a battle for Minseok’s heart. One he had to beat Minseok himself in.

 

“What’s the matter Kim? Can’t keep up?” he taunted. After months of watching him in the flesh, he knew Minseok hated being taunted. He knew Minseok hated being baited. Minseok’s brows furrowed, anger filling those beautiful eyes.

“Could say the same for you, pretty boy. I’m surprised you’re not ahead. What’s up? Can’t beat me can you?” he taunted back, that fake voice he had always used with Luhan disappearing. Luhan’s eyes sparkled as his eyes narrowed as well. He dashed forward, running past Minseok who immediately went around to block his every shot towards the goal. He was amazed. Minseok’s short legs were wicked and agile.

 

Minseok himself was extremely impressed. Luhan’s height wasn’t for nothing, he was exhausted trying to get around him. But he tried. As Luhan ran around him once more, he heard cheers for the two of them, but in this world, playing soccer with the love of his life, he could care less. He didn’t care about anyone else around them.

 

“One more minute!” he heard Daekyu faintly, before Luhan inhumanly ran past him. Minseok gasped slightly, running after him and blocking him all the way. He took the ball once, twice, but Luhan took it back, overpowering him. He was so tired, his legs burned from running, his lungs on fire as well, but he blocked and he ran and ran after Luhan who somehow managed to draw strength from some unkwown source, and when he saw Luhan’s eyes light up, he realized the huge mistake he made by leaving the other side wide open.

 

“LUHAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHOOT IT!!!!” he heard someone say, before Luhan looked at him for a brief second, his leg extending as far back as he could before it connected with his foot, the ball spinning in the air at a ridiculous speed towards the goal and Minseok realized then there was nothing he could do to stop it, watching helplessly as it rolled, gaining speed, before reaching the net and getting through it.

 

“YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LUHAN!!!!!!!!” he heard the club members cheer excitedly as the group of Minseok’s friends groaned and hollered in annoyance at their friends defeat.

 

Minseok sighed, his heart loud in his ears.

 

Luhan cheered and hollered with his team mates and whooped before falling to the floor excited and tired. He won. He was so happy. He won and it was the best game he’s ever played and he beat Minseok. He beat Minseok and that meant he earned his right, the right that in his head, he had put as his victory trophy.  

 

As the clock ticked and everyone collected their things to head home, Daekyu approached Minseok and led him towards Luhan. Jongdae and the rest of his friends also left, leaving only the three of them in the field.

 

“Very, very well played. I’m so pissed off at the both of you. Minseok for never even trying out for the team and you, Luhan for arriving too late.” Daekyu said annoyed but gently. Luhan laughed sheepishly. Minseok just watched awkwardly, not knowing what to do with himself.

 

“Why am I here? Luhan was the one that won right? Can I go now?” he said to Daekyu. Sure, he had told himself he’d say something but that didn’t mean it would be right this goddamn minute. Minseok was too prideful.

“Yes, he did. And for Luhan’s prize there’s only one thing I know he would’ve wanted more than anything.” Daekyu said to him, turning to Luhan with a knowing look. Luhan looked at his friend confusedly, and then at Minseok for a second.

“What does that have to do with me?” Minseok asked with a raised brow.

“Hyung...” Luhan said to his friend, horrified realizing what he was talking about.

“It’s time Luhan. C’mon.” Daekyu said to him, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. Minseok’s eyes narrowed. He felt like a third wheel.

“Um… I think I’m just gonna go...” he said, placing his bag properly over his shoulder.

“Luhan you won. What’s your prize? What did you want more than anything?” Daekyu said firmly.

 

Luhan knew his friend was doing it for him, forcing him. Seeing Minseok’s annoyed eyes and tired face, he couldn’t let the chance go. He walked forward until he was standing right infront of Minseok, who looked up at him wide eyed and beautiful.

“W-What?” Minseok stuttered nervously. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“You.” Luhan finally said outloud.

Minseok’s eyes widened more.

“W-What????” he repeated.

“What I want...” he said, placing his hands on Minseok’s arms. Minseok stiffened immediately,

 

“What I want is _you_.” he repeated more firmly, to Minseok’s face, before dashing forward and grabbing Minseok’s collar, crashing his lips against his. Minseok gasped, Luhan’s lips feeling slightly chapped against his own, but he couldn’t move away, too shocked out of his mind and his heart skipping horribly, before Luhan moved back, looking at him straight in the eyes.

“Luhan…..”

“Ok I’ll see you two lovebirds later.” Daekyu said to the two, a smile in his face as he sprinted away, leaving Luhan and Minseok alone, with Luhan’s arms around Minseok’s waist. Minseok didn’t know what to do or what to say, his tongue in his throat unable to let him speak. He squeaked in attempts at talking before he was interrupted.

“Please, listen to me first…. I know, you know. I know you know who I am. And I’ve always known you’re Xiumin. You’re _my_ Xiumin. And I know why you didn’t want to say anything too, but you don’t have to feel that way. I know the person you have always been. You’re the Xiumin I met when we were seven, the one who likes blue and cold noodles in the summer. I know you’re the kid who’s father is strict and who’s always trying his best to make him happy even when you hate it. I know you’re the same kid who wants to get his PhD some day, the one that loves soccer and wakes up early for no goddamn reason, the one who has a box under his bed with neatly arranged good memories.” he said, pulling his hands away until he was only holding Minseok by his hands. And Minseok was shaking as he heard Luhan talk, his eyes wide, watering.

“I also know you hate rules and I know you hate being told what to do………...you have a terrible temper you know….. I know you’ve skipped school a lot, that you’ve fought a lot and rumors say you’re violent but I know that’s not why you do it. I’ve seen you. I know you’ve helped out the bullied kids in the school. I know it’s because of you and your friends that no one dares to mess with weaker kids. You think I don’t see you sitting with that kid everyone thought was a loser? Sitting with him and not caring? And you think you’re awful? Really??????  You’re not a bad person Minseok. You’re wonderful. You’re free.” he said to him smiling. Minseok sobbed once.

 

“How? When did you--” he said as tears fell from his eyes. He couldn’t believe it.

“You knew it was me and you said nothing. It was so painful you know, watching in the sidelines, and I wanted to know why. I found all the answers I needed along the way. But I would never have shunned you. I thought you’d know that and trust me enough to let me know once you were comfortable. I met your father before too. I knew it was you all along, but I waited for you to come to me when you wanted to. But you didn’t and I know I’m just bringing this up on my own, and I’m sorry for just throwing this all on you like this but I just--.” Luhan said tiredly, his own eyes watering.

“I-I’m sorry. I wanted to say something. But you’re...you’re too good to be true to me…..I really thought you’d hate me…...” Minseok said, reaching up and cupping Luhan’s cheek. Luhan closed his eyes at the contact, sighing contentedly as his other hand held Minseok’s, his skin prickling at feeling of the soft skin.

“I’m not as great as you think I am. I’m average too. You, Minseok, are the one that’s wonderful.” he told him.

“You fuckin idiot--” he said before pulling Luhan in for another quick kiss, the two breathing each others air.

“I love you.” Luhan said to him without an ounce of hesitation unable to hold back all the feelings he had the entire time. And Minseok smiled, wide and big and full of happiness he couldn’t help laughing as he threw his arms around Luhan’s neck.

“I love you too. I’ve loved you for so long, I can’t believe this is real.” he said pressing his forehead against Luhan’s. Luhan laughed happily.

“You gotta believe it…...especially cause I just kicked your ass in soccer.” Luhan said, smirking.

 

And with that, Minseok kicked him in the nuts right there in the middle of the field.

 

Albeit, Affectionately.


End file.
